THE CLUB IS NOW OPEN FOR NEW MEMBERSHIP. THE CLUB HAS TWO SECTIONS AVAILABLE FOR MEMBERSHIP, BOWLING MEMBER AND ASSOCIATE MEMBERSHIP FOR BOTH LADIES AND GENTS. THE CRITERIA FOR BOTH OF THESE MEMBERSHIPS IS TO BE THICK SKINNED AND  HAVE A RIGHT GOOD SENSE OF HUMOUR.

 

Breaking News!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!    Breaking News !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 NOMINATED MIXED PAIRS THIS SATURDAY 2.00PM

 

Don't leave your ties till the last date as you may not receive an extension for your tie.

Our next outing is the league game against Anchor on Wednesday night, Would all players please make sure that they sign there names by Monday night to let the selectors know if they are available for selection.

the club are having a cabaret on Friday the first of June, and Tommy McShane who had the foresight to put our act into a Cryonics program, has un froze our entertainment, yes none other than FREDDY MERCURY will be performing on the night. Tickets are priced at £5.00 per person so get in quick to book your tickets.

The RBA what about the draw for the various tournaments. The draws have been split into 4 sections, below is the number of entries from each section and the tournaments. as you can see the under 45s in section 1 go straight into a quarter final. If memory serves me right the secretary said they would improve things this year, it certainly looks like it, NOT. Why was it not done as one draw, the numbers would certainly look good for it, but I would suggest it is a shambles. Lets hope that this is brought up at the next meeting of the clubs. To add to all this the Renfrewshire secretary was calling clubs to arrange section 3, jnr singles, pairs, triples and rink 35 minutes before a trip to Lochwinnoch, to tell them that the games were now being held at Charleston bowling club. At Victoria we knew on the Saturday before, after the Renfrewshire secretary told the all round good guy on the phone of the change, but half the teams playing arrived at Lochwinnoch only to be sent back to Charleston. Surely the Renfrewshire will reimburse those teams that had to make the journey. Personally speaking I think it is time for a change after this latest shambles.

	Section 1	Section 2	Section 3	Section 4	Total
Singles	17	14	20	15	66
Jnr Singles	4	8	18	10	40
Pairs	17	14	20	15	66
Triples	17	14	20	15	66
Fours	16	13	19	15	63
Sponsored 4	12	11	15	12	50
Seniors	14	13	19	12	58
Under 45s	2	8	11	7	28

Sleeze and the all round good guy were camping out one night, when all of the sudden Sleeze jumps up screaming,
"A SNAKE JUST BIT ME ON THE TIP OF MY PENIS!!".
The all round good guy said, "don't worry, I am going to town to find a doctor, I will be right back!".
So he goes to town, and finally finds a doctor.
"Doctor!! My friend just got bit by a snake!!!" the all round good guy says.
"It's ok", the doctor says, "all you have to do is suck the poison out.".
The all round good guy says thank you, and runs back to the camp site. The sleeze  asks, "WHAT DID THE DOCTOR SAY? WHAT DID HE SAY?"
,the all round good guy  replies, "doctor said your gonna die!"

 

A WEE VIDEO TO GET THINGS UNDER WAY,

HIT THE LINK BELOW

http://www.xtranormal.com/watch/13249922/presidentz-movie